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AK PSYCHOTHERAPY
About
About Me
Approach
Specialties
Trauma Therapy
Anxiety & Overwhelm Therapy
People Pleasing, Codependency, & Perfectionism Therapy
Depression & Burn Out Therapy
Services
Individual Therapy
Women's Support Group
EMDR Intensives
The Self-Trust Reset
FAQs
FAQs
Fees
Blog
Free Consultation
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Anxiety & Overwhelm Therapy
People Pleasing, Codependency, & Perfectionism Therapy
Depression & Burn Out Therapy
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EMDR Intensives
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The Hidden Cost of Hyper-Independence: Why You Struggle to Let Anyone In
Trauma Healing & Relational Wounds Alyssa Kushner, LCSW 8/7/25 Trauma Healing & Relational Wounds Alyssa Kushner, LCSW 8/7/25

The Hidden Cost of Hyper-Independence: Why You Struggle to Let Anyone In

If asking for help makes you feel ashamed or unsafe, you might be struggling with hyper-independence - a protective response rooted in trauma or unmet attachment need. Learn how it forms, how it affects relationships, and how to heal!

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If asking for help makes you anxious or feel “weak” you’re not alone!⁣
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Hyper-independence isn’t a personality trait like most it’s often a protective response.⁣
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When support wasn’t safe, doing it all alone felt Do you notice yourself downplaying your own pain?⁣
You might be self-invalidating without even realizing it.⁣
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Self-invalidation sounds like:⁣
“I shouldn’t feel this way.”⁣
“Other people have it worse.”⁣
“I’
Let’s talk about the silent treatment! This one can be subtle because it’s often mistaken for “taking space.” ⁣
⁣
Obviously if you’re dealing with your emotional safety that’s different, but in healthy relationship I’m an August Leo (sun and rising - and Virgo moon) and I’m using the month to tap into that fire energy!⁣
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August is a reminder to take up space, lead with joy, and radiate without apology. ⁣
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I’m choosing boldness, adventure and
Not every fast decision is the right one. And don’t confuse internal pressure and stress with purpose. Sometimes slowing down is the most powerful move you can make. Tapping into your values. ⁣
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Alignment creates more clarity and inner knowing Joy isn’t something to sleep on - it’s feedback. A regulated nervous system doesn’t just calm you down, it opens the door to pleasure, peace, connection and play⁣
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So feeling good and experiencing joy is a sign of safety.⁣
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More o Feeling grateful and fulfilled!⁣
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Got to:⁣
✨Paraglide in the French alps⁣
✨Hike Mont Blanc⁣
✨White water raft on the coldest river in France⁣
✨Spend quality time with loved ones in nature⁣
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Exactly what I needed to fuel me!⁣ Now excited and ready t

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Alyssa Kushner, LCSW
alyssakushnerlcsw@gmail.com

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