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AK PSYCHOTHERAPY
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Approach
The Work
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People Pleasing & Codependency Therapy
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5 Reasons Why We Self-Sabotage (Even When We Want Better for Ourselves)
Trauma & Self-Worth Alyssa Kushner, LCSW 5/18/25 Trauma & Self-Worth Alyssa Kushner, LCSW 5/18/25

5 Reasons Why We Self-Sabotage (Even When We Want Better for Ourselves)

Self-sabotage isn’t about laziness or lack of motivation - it’s often a trauma response. This blog explores the deeper reasons we hold ourselves back and how to heal from the patterns that keep us stuck.

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These aren’t tools I just recommend -  they’re ones I use in session, in my support groups with women, and honestly on myself before a hard conversation or when my own nervous system is running the show.⁣
⁣
The extended exhale before I re
Taking up space feels dangerous when your nervous system was taught that shrinking kept you safe.⁣
⁣
And not even because of a confidence problem. It really is a nervous system and adaptive attachment pattern that made complete sense when you learned
People-pleasing guilt doesn’t just sound like⁣
“I feel guilty.”⁣
⁣
Sometimes it sounds like:⁣
“What if they’re mad at me?”⁣
 “I should’ve just said yes.”⁣
 “Now I need to fix this.”⁣

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Alyssa Kushner, LCSW
alyssakushnerlcsw@gmail.com
Grab my free Nervous System Reset guide here

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