Your Body Remembers: The Subtle Ways Trauma Lives in the Nervous System
Have you heard of the phrase, the body keeps the score? Well even if you can’t recall every detail of what happened to you, your body remembers.
I see it in so many of my clients:
They’ve “moved on” in life, but still feel a constant background of anxiety or dread.
They know they’re safe now, but their body feels tense and guarded all the time.
They’re exhausted, but can’t relax and feel restless.
Or they’re shut down, going through the motions, but feeling disconnected from themselves and others.
This is the nature of trauma and even suppressed emotion. It doesn’t just live in your memories - it lives in your nervous system. And until you address it there, those subtle symptoms tend to linger.
What Is Trauma?
Trauma isn’t just about what happened to you - it’s about how your body and nervous system responded to what happened.
It can stem from a single overwhelming event, repeated harmful experiences (which can turn into CPTSD), or long-term emotional neglect. Trauma occurs when something is too much, too fast, too soon for your system to handle, and you don’t have enough safety or support to process it in the moment.
For some people, this might be a car accident, an assault, or a medical emergency. For others, it’s growing up in a home where you had to walk on eggshells, being consistently criticized or neglected, or taking on adult responsibilities far too young.
In each case, the nervous system steps in to protect you to help you survive - but when it doesn’t get the chance to return to baseline, those protective responses can get “stuck” in your body and mind.
Where Does Trauma Store in the Body?
When you experience something overwhelming, your body’s stress response kicks in. In a perfect world, once the threat is over, your body processes the stress and returns to balance. But when something is too big, too fast, too soon - or happens over and over - that stress response can get stuck in your system. Especially when you don’t immedietely have the right supports to address it.
Instead of releasing the survival energy, your body holds onto it. This stored energy can live in:
Muscles and fascia: Tight shoulders, clenched jaw, stiff hips.
Breath patterns: Shallow breathing, holding your breath without realizing it.
Digestive system: Gut tension, nausea, IBS-like symptoms.
Posture and movement: Hunched posture, guarded stance, hyper-alert scanning.
I’ve worked with clients who thought their chronic jaw clenching was “just stress” or their stomach pain was “just bad digestion,” only to discover those symptoms were directly linked to past trauma their body never felt safe enough to release. These aren’t random quirks - they’re your body’s way of keeping you prepared, just in case.
How Trauma Affects the Brain and Nervous System
Trauma doesn’t just change the way you feel - it changes the way your brain and body communicate.
Amygdala: Your brain’s alarm/fear system becomes overactive, constantly scanning for danger, even when none is present. This is why you might feel anxious in situations that seem harmless.
Hippocampus: The part of your brain that organizes memory can shrink under chronic stress, making it harder to distinguish between past and present. You might feel as if something that happened years ago is still happening right now.
Prefrontal Cortex: Responsible for decision-making, impulse control, emotion regulation, and rational thinking - trauma can disrupt its function, making it harder to stay calm and grounded in the moment. This is common with trauma, you might struggle to regulate your emotions, have “big” reactions, and feel consumed by your feelings.
In your nervous system, this often looks like cycling between hyperarousal (fight/flight) and hypoarousal (freeze/shutdown), or getting stuck in one of those states for long periods.
What Does Trauma Cause? Subtle Symptoms You Might Miss
When trauma is living in the body, the signs can be easy to overlook or dismiss. You might notice:
Chronic tension, especially in your neck, jaw, or shoulders
Stomach issues, nausea, or unexplained gut discomfort
Trouble falling or staying asleep - or sleeping too much but still feeling exhausted
Emotional numbness, dissociation, or feeling like you’re “just going through the motions”
Being easily startled or feeling “on edge” in normal situations
Difficulty concentrating or feeling foggy-headed
Feeling “too much” - intense emotional flooding - or feeling nothing at all
Trouble with intimacy, even with someone you trust
Persistent headaches
These symptoms aren’t character flaws. They’re survival responses that got locked in place - and until they’re addressed through the body, they tend to persist.
The Window of Tolerance: Why You Feel Stuck or Overwhelmed
One of the most helpful ways to understand trauma’s impact is through the concept of the Window of Tolerance. This is something I teach most of my clients within the first few sessions, regardless of trauma history.
Your Window of Tolerance is the zone where your nervous system feels safe enough for you to function well - where you can think clearly, feel your emotions without being overwhelmed, connect socially with other humans, and respond to life’s challenges with flexibility without shutting down.
When trauma lives in the body, your window can shrink dramatically and it makes it more likely for you to be bumped out. It also makes it harder to get back into the window. You may spend more time:
Above your window (hyperarousal): Feeling anxious, irritable, angry, panicky, restless, overwhlemed, unable to sit still, constantly scanning for danger.
Below your window (hypoarousal): Feeling numb, disconnected, fatigued, zoned out, or like you’re “watching your life from the outside.”
I often explain it like this: imagine your emotional “comfort zone” becomes very narrow. Even small stressors can push you into overwhelm or shutdown. Healing is about slowly expanding that window so you have more capacity to handle life without feeling hijacked by your nervous system.
Note: just learning and understanding your window of tolerance is huge! Part of the work is becoming aware of when you fall out of it, what that loos like (behaviorally, emotionally, and physically) and learning the tools to get back in (mindfulness, emotion regulation, grounding.) Therapy in itself can help expand your window of tolerance.
Why Talk Therapy Alone Sometimes Isn’t Enough
Many of my clients come in saying, “I’ve processed this in my head, but I still feel it in my body.”
That’s because understanding your trauma cognitively doesn’t automatically release the stored survival energy in your body.
Talk therapy is incredibly valuable for insight, shifting beliefs, and building emotional awareness - but trauma healing often also requires bottom-up approaches that work directly with the body and nervous system. This might include somatic therapy, EMDR, breathwork, gentle movement, or grounding tools.
How I Support Clients in Releasing Trauma from the Body
In my work as a trauma therapist, I integrate:
Somatic therapy to help you notice and work with body sensations safely.
EMDR to process traumatic memories while calming the nervous system.
Mindfulness and interoception to strengthen your awareness of internal cues like hunger, fullness, fatigue, and emotion.
Nervous system regulation skills so you can widen your Window of Tolerance over time and feel more resilient in daily life.
We go at a pace that feels safe for you - because forcing the body to “let go” before it’s ready can be re-traumatizing!
Healing Means Feeling Safe in Your Body Again
When you begin working directly with the body, you start to notice changes:
Your shoulders drop without you realizing it.
You can take a deep breath again.
You notice hunger, fullness, and fatigue cues.
You feel more present in your relationships.
You can rest without feeling restless or guilty.
Your body is not your enemy. It’s been working to protect you in the only way it knew how. The work now is to show it that it’s safe to let go - and to return to a sense of connection with yourself!
About the author
Hi! I'm Alyssa! I’m a trauma therapist that specializes in helping women heal from relational trauma, c-ptsd, anxiety,
codependency, perfectionism, and people pleasing patterns. My approach blends holistic, somatic, nervous system care, & EMDR.
✨ I provide online therapy to adults located in New York, New Jersey, Washington, DC, and Maryland.
📩 Email me at alyssakushnerlcsw@gmail.com or schedule a free 15-minute consultation to get started.
💬 Follow me on Instagram for more tips, tools, and inspiration around healing, self-trust, and mental health.
✨Not ready for therapy yet? Stay connected by subscribing to my free monthly newsletter, where I share a free nervous system workbook, mental health tips, journal prompts, and upcoming offerings to support your healing journey.
Disclaimer
This post is meant for educational purposes only and isn’t a substitute for diagnosis, assessment or treatment of mental conditions. If you need professional help, seek it out.
